The girls went to Johns Hopkins with me this time, and somehow I remembered these things much more painful during the process, but it is actually áfter' a bone marrow biopsy to your hip that you 'really' feel what they did back there. I have attached a photo for people with my humor. They did … Continue reading Myeloma Update
Like every 44 year old woman… I secretly love rap music (haha)… Welcome to my mind. When OCD/ADHD shows up - I start listening and exercising, doing yard work, cleaning house and this prompts deep thoughts. Much of my present day life is spent isolating for hours at a time just to think about what … Continue reading I’ve been thinking lately…
*My 3 day roadtrip to Mississippi was an emotional energy rollercoaster that stayed inside my body 3 days prior, until maybe 3 days after. *now compute that. - My best friend rode along to make sure I did not snooze at the wheel, and… did not over-react like a crazy mom (externally). I neglected to factor … Continue reading Motherhood
"Why am I still here?” To be here - Add some health related issues… extreme adversity and you can really experience - Life… I was diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma at age 37, given 3-5 years, 5-7 years, and now at 44, and off chemo and in a remission - also told not to ever expect … Continue reading So, Now What?
I carry around a backpack that doubles as a family records filing cabinet. Most days you can find me in a lobby waiting at any point. I have time to learn a lot about myself and my children in all this 'down-time'. If a child is struggling with depression aggravated by an all-consuming-Eating Disorder... parents/caregivers … Continue reading Take a Ride with me…
Not so much. But let us walk down a nostalgic lane for about 2 minutes... Imagine some "metaphoric" moments in my life with me... the elf is aka 'life' tells me: "This is whatcha get, move along, there are more kids behind you" and shoves me up the stairs a tad, as I freeze, knowing … Continue reading Merry Christmas?
Ever have A DAY that changes YOUR life in a way that you did not feel possible? Ever have more than one? Quite disorienting. Please forgive the sad tone... it has been a day, of a sequence of days.... I am unsure of who reads my words or if they make any difference in the … Continue reading Grief
Hey! "Keep your Tetanus shot records up to date." What had happened was... On my way to group therapy. Text message to buddies: I am so glad we have group this morning! My fight or flight brain circuits keep me on alert, physically watching for anything. Takes too long to relax the mind, fall asleep … Continue reading It. Bit. Me.
The greatest part of GroundHog Days, is once you get it RIGHT, you get brand new days until you find yourself stuck again. This, my friends, is my current status. :). Thanks for hanging out.
I survived, so now what? Survivors guilt? A chance to live semi-stress-free for a little while... not too much to ask. Do survivors struggle with the sense of loss or twilight-zone in-limbo feeling when dreaming of a better future?